School Daze!!

Whether I want it to or not, school starts tomorrow morning.

A big thank you to Ella for helping me get my classroom set up and for suggesting a "Getting to Know You" game - I'll let you know how it goes!

I really just have to get through the first day, and then I'm in gear for the year!

Where Nothing is Long Ago

The title of this post comes from the title of a rather interesting memoir by Virginia Sorenson - and it deserves a post all its own. But for now, I want to focus on something that "came" to me today as I drove home from Santa Fe Middle School. I'm sure that part of this stems from the fact that it was 31 years ago this month that we came here. And the weather and sky and school and the town just brings that all back.

Our start-of-school meeting was held at Santa Fe, and as I headed out on to Duarte Road to go home, I was thinking about Ida Smith and her recent death. That thought seemed to segue into thoughts about my first forays into the neighborhoods around Santa Fe's campus.

I was a Primary teacher - back in the day when Primary was held during the week. I was pretty gung-ho and wanted to do the job right, so I took treats to my kids - especially those who were less active. This meant poring over the Thomas Guide to figure out where they lived. And then loading up into that yellow Ford truck we were driving back then. (Dad was still in Utah I think. He didn't join us permanently until September.) Bonny, Harry, Phoebe, and I squeezed into the front - I don't think seat belts were the law then - and roamed about Monrovia looking for my little lost sheep.

Ida was a good friend to me as I adjusted to a move that I had initially been very opposed to. Sometimes I think about how negative I was. I was not very kind to Harry about it either. Everything was his fault. Every bad thing that happened would not have happened if we hadn't moved. I am not proud of my behavior. Sometimes I think I'm still trying to make up for it!

(You all know the story - about how I came to know that it was not only not a bad move, it was definitely the right move! Sometimes we have to trust in something and someone and move forward. But that too is another post.)

Others in the ward were kind to us. I had great, thoughtful, caring visiting teachers who visited every month. I had Jan Holmes for an Avon Lady - how can you go wrong with that?? Polly was our piano teacher - and she didn't just teach us music. Connie Heslop was our baby sitter - kind, quiet, gentle Connie - who didn't feel better around her? Brother Holling was our home teacher - and he came each month with a message and Eskimo Pies! The high priest group leadership was there to unload when we moved in - Aulvie Bourgeous, LaMar Heslop, Ted Elwell, Tom Smith, Bishop Neeley. I was Mildred Muir's secret sister and she became our special friend. Yvonne Jorgensen shared her doll collection with Bonny. Blanche Card was the nursery baby sitter during sacrament meeting. The first Sunday we attended was the confirmation of the Dequer twins. I could go on and on and name names that would send some of you on a trip down Memory Lane. But that will be another post also.

For now, I realize the meaning of Virginia Sorenson's title. The past is always with us; it doesn't take much to call it back.

And aren't you glad for that??

And aren't we all glad Dad felt impressed to move back to California? And aren't we all glad that Grandma Helen found us a rental house in Monrovia? And aren't we all glad that we've been able to stay in Monrovia and build happy memories here??

I am!

Some late night thoughts

When I was out visiting my mom a couple of weeks ago, she commented that her house - the one where I grew up - is the only house on the block that has never been sold. Something I hadn't thought of. And when I mentioned it to Dad, he pointed out that the house to the south of us had never been sold either.

She also mentioned that she'd never lived alone. When my dad died, Donna was living there too. She said, "I lived with my parents until I got married. Then I lived with your dad. And now I live with Donna." I have never lived alone either - unless you count the 6 months in Grenoble when I had a room to myself in the dormitory at the university there. Not that I'm itching to live alone or anything!! Actually I was talking to a friend who has lived alone for 25 years - and she said she still sometimes feels sad about being alone. She said, "You'd think I'd be used to it."

I also thought about the "If you give a mouse a cookie" syndrome. I had one overly ripe banana - so I ended up mashing up two less than ripe bananas to have enough to make a loaf of banana bread. I'll let you know how it tastes. It does smell good baking.

I am impressed anew at how easy it is to forget what seem like essential details. At least they at one time seemed essential. I have been back in my classroom setting it up for Monday's start of school. I can't remember where I put anything!! (We have to pack up our rooms because they are used by other teachers for summer school.) And I need to remember my passwords, not just for the computer, but for the copy machine. Where is the safe place I wrote them down?? And where did I put the pencils??

Speaking of remembering, I continue to run into former students - whose faces are very familiar and whose personalities are engraved in my memory. But not their names!! The latest incident happened at the Street Fair last week. The young man said, "Hey Mrs. Terrill, do you remember me?" I asked him to refresh my memory with his name, which he did. Then he pointed out his infant son to me. And I said, "Are you old enough to have a child??" (He certainly didn't look old enough - nor did the proud little mother of the baby!) He said he was. I hope he was a student of mine 10 or 12 years ago!!

On this chipper note, I will sign off and go check on the banana bread.

Little Bee - some thoughts

I have had this book on my shelf for over a year. I think I bought it at our Book Fair - I like to support the Clifton Middle School Library after all! And occasionally I thumbed through it thinking I should read it. The back cover reviews actually didn't entice me however, and I put off reading it. It was mentioned often, but I received conflicting reviews.

For lack of any other book that caught my interest, I picked it up and started reading. The story line was intriguing, and the writing was superb.

"They say that in the hour before an earthquake the clouds hang leaden in the sky, the wind slows to a hot breath, and the birds fall quiet in the trees of the town square. Yes, but these are the same portents that precede lunchtime, frankly. If we overreacted every time the wind eased up, we would forever be laying down under the dining-room table when we really should be laying the plates on top of it."

Several reviewers called it "funny," but it wasn't at all funny to me. Maybe some scenes were poignantly amusing at some moments, but I don't call that funny.

Another reviewer compared it to Chinua Achebe's Things Fall Apart, and that seemed an apt comparison to me.

It is fast-paced, thoughtfully written, often disturbing, and ultimately a story of human triumph - however fleeting.

The Grandma Summer

This has been a summer of grandmothering - and a very enjoyable one at that!! This week Esme and Annika were here for several days while Bonny went to Girls' Camp with Ara and Ella. So of course we went for manicures!!

The girls chose shades of teal, purple, and dark pink for their nails. (I contrast that with the way I always go for the palest shade of pink!!)

Flowers with a tiny jewel in the middle on the thumb nail were a big hit too.

I sensed that Porter and Harry W. were feeling a bit left out, so I took them to lunch at Wendy's. We had Uncle Noah come along - always lots of fun. I told Noah that I needed to come up with a male equivalent to manicures - and he suggested going for a barber shop shave - but acknowledged that I'd have to wait a few years for that to be a big hit!

Then there's the lovely Miss Isla - who is happy with a smile, a tickle, and "Tom Thumper, Bill Munker, Long Razor, Cherry Bumper. (Tippy, tippy, tippy, town end.)"

Since Esme and Annika are going home tomorrow, Eve joined us for a sleepover - here they are getting ready for the latest installment from Grandpa Bob.

I've never listened in on any of these - they are pretty much off the cuff though. Harry says that they will ask for a repeat of a previous one - but he can't remember the details after he's told them!!

I've reflected often on why I love being a grandmother so much. I was thinking that it's probably because I loved my own grandmothers, and also because my own children seem to love their grandmothers dearly. I certainly want to be in the company of those women!!

Ella comes next week for an early Grandma's Birthday Sleepover, then Eve, Porter, and Harry will be having them. And Calvin is coming this year on his birthday - so we will have to see about a shave and a haircut I guess!!

Where were you a year ago?

Do you play the "a week ago at this time I was . . ." game?

I do.

I find myself saying, "Three weeks from today it will be the short day at Clifton" or "two weeks ago today I was happily hugging sweet Sully."

I just wondered if everyone does it. Or just me.

(The above is from the Clayton Reunion - a year ago last weekend!!)

The Dog Days of August

This is a photo from June - but I did go visit my mom on August 7th - which was also my Grandpa Stevens birthday!! (and Hannah Kerksiek's b-day too.) Just thought a I needed a photo.

I'm not sure where the phrase about the "dog days of August" comes from. And actually, so far, this August is warm but pleasant - certainly not "dog like."

Maybe it's because school will start at the end of this month. Summer vacation will be over. I stayed in bed this morning and finished a novel rather than getting up and being productive. I'm doing my best to thumb my nose at the inevitable necessity of going back to work.

And today the date is 8-9-10.

That's a nice touch.

When the stars line up just right!!

I remember as a young mother - and even as a middle-aged mother - how I would plan the days so that I had time to myself. Most days it worked out pretty well. Some days everything went wrong.

But today, the stars were all lined up just right - Henry was at Cub Day Camp, Calvin was invited by the neighbors to go to the lake.

Agnes, who can sometimes "resist" her nap, fell asleep right after lunch. On the couch yes, but asleep, so who's complaining??

Baby Sully dozed off too - and so I sent Phoebe downstairs to take a nap. And I laid on the other couch and read!!

Just like the old days!!

Grandmothering

This is an old photo of me in 1977 when I was pregnant with Phoebe. I was 32 years old, and certainly I never imagined being 65 and having 14 grandchildren.

And here I am, 33 years later, spending my days and nights mothering Phoebe and grandmothering the others!

I love being a grandmother. It's much more satisfying and rewarding than I ever imagined it could be. I love my own children, and I enjoy being a mother. But somehow being a grandmother just pulls it all together and makes it all fit nicely.

As the numbers grew, I began to worry about the fact that I see some of my grandkids much more often than I do the others. I try to send cards, little gifts, letters. We have done some Skyping - but I think the adults enjoy that more than the kids do.

But two weeks ago, while we were at Matt and Eliza's, I noticed that Theo and Ida took to us quite readily. Eliza does try to keep pictures of us in front of them, talks about us, and generally does a good job of keeping us in the picture.

But I think what's at work is a cumulative effect. In other words, if you try to make the minutes count, they will. If you do your best to connect with the children, talk to them, play with them, spend time with them, it will register with them. Most importantly though, I believe it stays with them. And then the next time you come, you can start literally building the relationship from where you left off.

As I sat a dinner tonight and last night with Henry, Calvin, and Agnes, we were all very comfortable. The last time we were together was April, and before that it had been Christmas, but the transition seemed almost seamless.

Calvin did say, the morning after I arrived, "I wish your husband could have come." But I'm pretty sure that he knows my husband is his grandfather!!

It was comforting to figure this all out!!

Late night thoughts on the journey we call mothering

I'm here at Phoebe's with access only to her photos - but it's the thought that counts!

When I was a little girl, I played with dolls all the time. I didn't have the latest dolls or accessories, but I dreamed of having them. I look at the variety and availability of doll gear today and wonder how I would have reacted to having such splendor!!

But we made do. I was third oldest of 12, so there was lots of real baby gear around for us to modify. We set up households and played in them.

I also tended younger siblings. I remember standing by my youngest brother's crib and rocking it gently so he'd go to sleep. That was often my assignment. And I babysat lots and lots.

I thought I knew what mothering meant and what it entails. When I had my first child, my mother kept saying, "Why do you seem so amazed by all this? You grew up with babies all around you?"

I did "catch on" eventually. And I got the external part of it wired. But I'm still having "ah ha" moments when I watch other women, mostly the young women I see in my daily life, doing or saying things that I wish I'd done or said with my children.

We went to visit Phoebe's new little boy tonight - he was born this afternoon, and I'm here with her other children for the next two weeks. And as I sat and held this sweet little person, I was thinking about my own children. I'm not sure I "cherished" their babyhood. I think I thought often about "moving along" and getting to a point where life was more organized and predictable.

With my last child though, I determined to enjoy his infancy. My husband would laugh when he'd hear me telling someone that I couldn't do something or help with something because I had a new baby. He'd say, "Noah is 9 months old Barbara." And I'd say, "He's the last baby I'll ever have. He's still new."

I sat and held him and read stories to him and took him for walks and played with him. I really focused on him as a baby. And he was a good baby. He loved to sit quietly in your lap and be read to. He loved to go with you.

The great irony here is that Noah is our wayward boy. Noah is sweet, loving, kind, and out of the loop with the rest of the family. He not only marches to the beat of his own drum, none of us are sure just what that drum beat is. And he's not making very good choices along the way.

I thought I'd erred by not giving my other children enough time. So, I gave the last one lots more time.

I guess it doesn't have everything to do with what you do as a mother. I guess it has more to do with who your children are.

I know all this. I've gone over and over it in my head, with my husband, with my other kids, with my friends.

When I see a sweet new baby though, it all comes back to me - and seems even more poignant.

Just some thoughts. I shouldn't be left alone so much!!

Books I've Read the Past While

I have been reading up a storm it seems - but then someone will say, "So, what are you reading?" and my mind goes blank!!

A list:

Theo Boone: Kid Lawyer by John Grisham - I am an unabashed Grisham fan - this is his initial foray into the world of adolescent fiction. I'm not sure adolescents will like it though. But like all Grisham books, I find it a "page turner" but not always because it's gripping or scary - I just want to get the "rest of the story" as they say.

Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford - I loved this!! It's about WW II and the Japanese internment camps - but it's a love story - the best kind! Maybe not literature - but a great summer read.

The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein - can I just say this was wonderful reading!! It's a story of love and loss and victory - told by the dog!! (and it works!!)

The Inheritance of Loss by Kiran Desai - strange and Indian - but then most of the Indian books I read are - but it's compelling. And it paints very vivid word pictures.

Joe Hill by Wallace Stegner - I'm currently plowing through this, but it's not very compelling. Usually Stegner is - so I'm a little perplexed.

I'm re-reading Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton for my book group in September. I always like her books - even in the re-reading. Maybe it's a sign I've forgotten them from the first time!!

And I've read a plethora of forgettable adolescent novels this spring - mostly to see if I want to recommend them to my students - they are usually well-written as far as demonstrating competent prose, but they don't "speak to me" so much. One was about a girl with an autistic brother - it was pretty well done - but it almost seemed too politically correct, if you follow my drift.

I need to find something to take to Phoebe's - or maybe she will have something there - where's some good airplane fiction when you need it??

Latest read

I had to be seriously persuaded to read this book. I had had it recommended to me by several people - but every time I read the brief synopsis, I was sure I wouldn't like it.

Then a friend brought it over to me and insisted I had to give it a try. She's a very persuasive woman, so I did. And at first, I put it down more than I picked it up.

But then I got hooked - and wasn't finished when we left for Oregon last week. We were driving - and I can't read while riding in a car. But that didn't stop me from picking it up every time we had to stop for anything!! And I stayed up at the first motel we stayed at - and finished it.

I think everyone has read it already - but if you haven't, be sure you do!!

"Il y a longtemps que je t'aime"

Dad and I saw the previews to this film - and thought it looked like something we'd enjoy. So we put in on our NetFlix queue.

The critics were divided - but we aren't - we thought it was very well done. The acting was superb, the characters were finely drawn, the story built slowly but effectively - and the ending worked - even though most of those who were negative objected to the ending.

If you enjoy foreign films, add this to your list.

"Never let her go . . . "

For her birthday, Jan and I took Anna May to see South Pacific at the Ahmanson. (Anna May is the office manager where I teach - and Jan works in the office with her.)

It was a great performance!! I am very familiar with the music, but I'm pretty sure I never have seen the movie or the musical.

But during my freshman year in college, our ward did some numbers from it for a roadshow!!

I loved it - very high energy and some great songs.

Father's Day Re-cap

It was a quiet day in Monrovia - Harry had to go to work at 4:30, so we ate at 4, and he joined us briefly. Greg had gone to the High Sierras - but got back a couple of hours after we'd started, but he joined us because there was plenty of food!! (Dawn did babyback ribs, corn on the cob, baked potatoes, and Symphony Bar Brownies for dessert. Greg contributed some great sourdough from Lone Pine. I brought fruit!! It was a tasty meal.)

Miss Isla rolls all over the floor and generally is very charming.

Eve did a little "walking like an Egyptian" for us.

Porter went outside and got wet - and seemed to be enjoying it immensely! (Dad rode his bike over to Harry and Dawn's - we are becoming regular cyclists around here!!) (Don't watch for me anywhere but on the bike trail though!)

Harry W. was a tad under the weather - but a good sport about it.

Dawn and kids made Father's Day t-shirts once again - always a big hit. Noah gave Dad a Coaster's CD - some good tunes. Dad is loving the apricot tree - unfortunately so are the deer. We are working on it.

A nice start to the hazy, lazy days of summer!!

Doing My Part For Big Hair!!

Bonny posted a link to a big hair photo of the Worsley girls.

Just thought you'd get a chuckle out of my own foray into the world of "Big Hair!!"

Dinner with the "Girls of '45"

We usually do the restaurant scene - but with all the leftover food from the party, we just hung out and "grazed" at our dining room table.

Maybe we'll have a joint 90th celebration too! (Someday!!)

A blast from the past!!

There's something great about the 80's, isn't there??

Donna said this was taken after she got back from her mission. Betsy and Erika dressed her and did her hair and accessories.

Does anyone else see a resemblance between Donna and Hannah Rebekah??

Memorial Day, 2010

Memorial Day began as a way to honor those who died in the Civil War, and it was originally called Decoration Day. Women, mothers and wives of those who had died, were appalled at the condition of the graves and cemeteries where the war dead had been laid to rest. So they went and pulled weeds, planted flowers, and painted the crosses that had been erected.

Over time, those who had died in other wars were honored also, and the day came to be called Memorial Day. For many years it was always noted on May 31st, but then was included in the Senate bill that put most holidays on a Monday.


I remember it that way, so whenever it falls on the 31st now, I am reminded of days gone by. I especially remember one year when Memorial Day was a Thursday. I went to the beach and got burned!! I had been working in an office since I had graduated from high school in January, so I had forgotten that my previous imperviousness to the sun had come about gradually - while out of doors at school.

The burn was bad enough that I felt sick - but if I didn't go to work on Friday, I wouldn't get paid for Thursday!! It was a miserable day, to say the least!!


A quote from John F. Kennedy seems apropos here, "A nation reveals itself not only by the men it produced, but also by the men it honors, the men it remembers."

A little family history

Dad emailed these letters to me - and I finally figured out how to post them. There are more - I will post them also.

Letters from Harry Francis Terrill

to his mother Annie Hamilton Terrill (Fell)

U. S. M. S "St. Louis"

On board Sta St Louis

May 19th, 1897

Dear Mama;-

It is now 10 o’clock of the last day of our journey by this boat. We

have been within sight of England all morning and will land at

Southampton at about 3 o’clock this afternoon.

We have had a very smooth trip but we have not made a very fast trip

on account of the steamer having to go out of her course to avoid

floating ice which at this time of year comes down from the North.

Willie has not enjoyed the trip very much as he had not felt well. He

was a little sick the first two days and has not felt real well since.

I was a little sick the first day and have felt very well since except that

I could not eat very much.

We reach Southampton England at three o’clock and leave there at 12

o’clock at night arriving in Havre France at 11 o’clock the next day.

It is then only about 4 hours run to Paris.

There was a lady came aboard sick at New York, with two little

children, and she died during the voyage, she was buried at sea.

We have made a good many friends during the trip and quite a few are

from California.

There are a great many theatrical people aboard and some of them

have made things very jollie. They gave a concert last night and took

up a subscription for the benefit of the Sailors, Widows and Orphans

homes in England and America.

I hope you are all well and having a good time.

With love to everybody from Willie and myself.

I remain

Your loving son

Harry

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