More from the daily "Need To Know" at Clifton Middle School

I'm becoming fond of the quotes these days.

Latest fave:

"Making a mistake is just another way of doing things."

Katherine Graham

I like the sentiment here - not just learning from your mistakes, but feeling that you didn't really do too badly!

What say today -

Here are two quotes about change,

"Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself."

Count Leo Tolstoy

and

"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the one we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek."

Barack Obama

Food for thought.

Now and Then

Here's a shot from Monday's festivities at Terrill Manor. Notice the older Ogilvie girls with Ara and Ella on the front row.

Here they are a couple of years ago - maybe 3??

Changes are so dramatic at this stage - I notice how much my current 8th graders have changed since they were 6th graders.

Three of these young ladies are now middle school students - and Ella is not far behind.

They have so much ahead of them - but they are not thinking of that. They are in the here and now - as they should be.

It's just for old grannies like me to muse upon the passing of time - and what it bodes for all of us.

I just want them to enjoy the here and now - and then they will have happy memories to look back on !

Errata

So, this is why you shouldn't post late at night!

I thought I was posting to this blog - and when it didn't show this a.m., I was perplexed.

Until I discovered that I'd posted my late night thoughts to this blog.

Hmm - what other mistakes did I make last night - better check my lunch carefully before I eat it today!!

Happy Birthday Madge!!

Phoebe and the other Young Women in the ward liked to call their leaders by what they thought were pretty hilarious nicknames. For example, Bonnie Kinch was Bonch and Margaret was Madge. (I think they called Pam Pam-ella. It was all about exaggeration.)

This is an older photo - maybe from 1998 or maybe even 1997. I think it was New Beginnings or maybe it was Young Women in Excellence.

It was the only photo of Madge I could quickly get my hands on. It is flattering anyway!

I met Margaret when Michelle was a baby - and it's been a wonderful friendship - for me anyway! I can remember calling her on late evenings - both of our husbands were off working usually - and we'd chat while we worked - I often ironed while I talked to her. Margaret has a keen mind and is very insightful - she has blessed my life with her wisdom.

Happy Day to a good friend!!

Same place - what a difference a decade or so makes!

Ara as a toddler in 1998 - in the wooden bowl - which all Terrill children and grandchildren want to sit in.

Hannah in the same bowl - 12 years earlier!

And Ara will be twelve in less than two weeks.

It could boggle my mind if I let it!

Grandkids!

This is an old photo - from 1998 - the year we rented a place in Laguna at Christmas time.

This weekend, we have Bruce and Bonny's girls here - and frankly, Ella is a big help with Annika - where do the years go?

When you first have grandkids, you love doing the new baby thing all over again - reliving the sights, the sounds, the smells.

Then you love watching them grow - tonight I recommended a book to Ara - and she started reading it! Whoa, where indeed do the years go?

But it does keep getting better and better!

"Here, Kitty, Kitty . . "

We all know Hannah's love for all things feline.

So when I came upon these two quotes today, I couldn't resist:

"What greater gift than the love of a cat?"
Charles Dickens

and

"The smallest feline is a masterpiece."
Leonardo Da Vinci

I don't necessarily love all cats. But I did indeed love Cosmo - and I miss him still.

No regrets!!

My m.o. for blogging is often, "Let's look through the photos and see what inspires me."

This is Douglas Street in Salt Lake City in 1970 - in January or February.

We lived there. And I walked to work in this kind of weather. (It's about 3 blocks from the U of U, where I worked and Harry attended school.)

I have been reading posts complaining about inclement and cold weather.

We've been at 80+ for the last week. One day when I left work at 5 p.m. it was 78 degrees!!

It's supposed to be 82 tomorrow. But it is cooling down - it will only be 71 next Friday!!

I wasn't keen on moving back to SoCal when we came in 1979. But after one winter here I was heard to say, "Okay, we'll stay until the kids are grown."

Amend that to say "We'll stay. Period."

As Leslie is wont to say, "You can take the girl out of the sunshine, but you can't take the sunshine out of the girl!!"

(I'm not really trying to make you snow bunnies feel bad - but we get so much bad press for our fires, earthquakes and riots, it's good to have something to crow about!)

"When the family gets together. . "

My sister-in-law on the Clayton side called and wanted to know if there was a family reunion this year. Somehow, the reunions on both sides of the family have devolved onto my shoulders.

I'm wondering if I'm up to it. The Clayton one is pretty simple - just mail out flyers and go early to claim a spot at Huntington State Beach. Well, there is a bit more - we have to buy food and collect money, but it's mostly just work the week before - once the flyers have been mailed anyway.

The Terrill one is more complex - since the number of people who will come is directly related to where we have it. And Grandma says she's really not up to travel anymore.

It's definitely going to be a decision Harry and I will have to make. We don't have a summer break at the temple anymore - the closing dates are May and November instead of August and December - like they have been for a hundred years!!

I keep reading about all these fantastic family reunions that take place in glamorous locations - it's kind of like the perfect grandchildren photos I always see!!

Hmm - something more to stress about - seems like an oxymoron doesn't it??

Fred and Joan in LA

Joan and Fred are here from Memphis. Since I forgot to take a picture of them tonight, this will just have to do!!This is their wedding day in 1968. My, don't we all look young!

Hooray for blogging!

I was looking for a photo of Leslie and went to the photos from Joey and Mercy's wedding. I came across this shot of Sean and Keli at the wedding luncheon.

I remember Keli coming up to me and saying, "Hi Aunt Barbara - how great to see you." And I remember thinking - "Thank heavens for blogs, so that I know that this is Keli - and the baby she is carrying is Greta." Without blogging, I would have struggled to remember which bride of which of one of my brother's sons was this! (Sean was not with her - if Sean had been with her, I would have known it was Sean - I knew him as a baby, so I usually recognize him - he also looks like a Clayton - and that helps!!)

Those who criticize blogs obviously know all of their relatives and see them all the time.

I am not so fortunate - and so I have loved getting to know far- flung family better via blogging.

And I thought this was a sweet shot of this happy pair. (Karl always tells me I need to use pictures, and not just words.)

Agnes Marietta Busath Clayton

Friday the 9th was my Grandma Clayton's birthday. I had meant to post on time, but didn't.

So I will post late.

My grandmother died when my father was 17. But he always talked about her. Every Mother's Day when he talked about her, he always got very emotional. She must have been a big influence in his life, because she was always very close and real to him. I enjoyed hearing about her, since her name is my middle name - I would ask my father's cousins about her, and they told me stories about her. She sounds like a lovely person.

When my dad died, it was just before Harry and Dawn's wedding. Dad had been quite ill, and Mom had not gone many places. So I asked her if she wanted to go with us to El Paso - we were driving.

She said, "If they told your dad he could come back, he would say no. He is finally reunited with his mother, and he has been waiting for that for a long time. So I might as well go with you."

I look forward to meeting her.

Sunday in the city

It's Sunday, and I have a presidency meeting tonight - we are getting things in gear for the Women's Conference on January 31st!!

I work with some wonderful women - and they have taught me a great lesson.

I never was president of anything - except Granada Hills High School eons ago - until I was called as Young Women's President back in 1996. It seemed a bit daunting, but I remember Phoebe going with me to Sav-on and we bought bags full of stuff that she said would work with the values, etc. (I did end up using most of the stuff - but must confess that a lot of it got used for Relief Society instead!)

Somehow feeling that I had stuff ready made the task less daunting. I plunged into it - and ended up having Hannah and Eliza in my fold, and Harry was the bishop and we just brought Noah along so it seemed like a big family activity.

I had good counselors and other personnel, but I made the grave error of doing way too much of it myself. I had lots of reasons - some of my counselors had conflicts and couldn't do certain things, sometimes I waited too long and felt bad about asking anyone else, sometimes I wanted it done my way and just did it.

Even though I loved the girls and loved the assignment, I have always been sorry that I didn't delegate more and didn't involve the girls themselves more in the planning and implementation.

The good news: in retrospect I have learned how important it is to let go and let others do things their way. And so I have delegated. And it has been a good experience.

I haven't especially gotten out of having to do things, but I have been able to do more things that were maybe more important for me to do, while others did the jobs that were important for them to do.

So now we are planning our big event of the year - I will let you know how it goes!!

We're not here today

Harry and I are at the temple this weekend. We go 2 weekends a month. We stay at the temple apartments.

It's actually pretty pleasant. The apartments are not fancy, but they are adequate. Sometimes you even have a TV. But we always bring our computer and watch movies on it.

And when the lights are out and you open up the curtains, the damp ocean air drifts in and you can pretend you are anywhere.

The photo above is 1973 I think - I loved that dress - thought it was very fetching - it was in the dress-up bag for years.

And if you look closely, you can see the handbag I crocheted - I have some hidden skills you didn't know about!

What to say on the 3rd day??

I found this doll that Harry is holding. I don't remember much about it - like where it came from. I believe it was a gift someone made for him.

This is why it's important to write things down - you never think you will forget something, but you will.

I remember as a young woman asking my mother about her bridal shower. She said she couldn't remember any details. I was aghast.

Ask me about my bridal shower. I can only remember that I wore a black wool sheath dress that I thought was the height of fashion - but I only know that because Joy sent me a picture a few years ago!

They also made a goofy scrapbook for me - which I still have - but I have no memory of the making of it.

And I know that Moyne and MarDel spearheaded a group gift of a bonnet style hair dryer - something most of you have never seen but I really wanted one - and was delighted to get it.

So write stuff down - I guess our brains get so full of the stuff we are dealing with now, so the other stuff just gets pushed back more and more - kind of like the shoes on the floor of my closet.

Although I have re-read the journal I kept in France - and it's all there in my handwriting - but some of those memories just aren't there anymore!

Maybe we should just enjoy the present - and record the past in case anyone ask questions!

Second post in a row

I got an email from my cousin Phyllis today.
She was younger than me and I don't have a lot of memories from when we were children.

But in our adult years, she has been the best about staying in touch. I had lost touch with her, but she found me on Facebook - and so we've been corresponding.

Her mother died early last year - and I sent her some photos I taken of Aunt Audrey when we visited her a couple of years ago. She said that the last time she'd seen her mother she hadn't look very well, so she was glad to see a picture of her in relatively good health.


And then she shared her feelings about my mom and dad and how supportive they'd always been of her mom, especially after Uncle Ted, my dad's brother, left the family. She said they'd gone to her civil wedding, encouraged her to go to the temple in a year, and then had been there when she did go a year later.

She also said that my parents, my uncle and my grandparents had "drawn Audrey and her family into the protection of the family circle" after Ted left. Not especially excluding Ted, but making sure that Audrey didn't feel abandoned. And she said that had been very meaningful to her mom.

I guess I sometimes just see my parents - and my mother is the surviving one - as where they are right now and not as being so involved in others' lives. But it puts a whole new perspective on things for me. My mom and dad were probably a lot like how we are now - helping others, being involved in peoples' lives, visiting, calling, staying in touch.

I remember when Grandmother Taylor died - Helen said her greatest sorrow was that those saying goodbye to her didn't really know her as she had been - they only knew how she had been in her declining years.

I look around at the older people I know (older than me anyway!!) and wonder just what they were like. Some of them I have known for 30 years and I can see the changes and I know how they were - and all of them aren't able to do as much anymore.

It's pretty important to try to see people for just who they are and have been - and to understand and value the "whole package."

That's what I want people to do for me!

Daily thoughts

In the spirit of not making resolutions, I was going to resolve to post daily.

I think such a resolution will go the way of my resolutions in the past to write daily in a journal.

About the only things I do daily are pray, eat, sleep, work, and floss my teeth (sometimes I don't get in my scripture reading!!)

And I read the blogs - but not always daily - we go away sometimes where there are no computers.

Actually, there are a number of things I do daily - but they are not fodder for a blog - they are the mundane processes of life.

Our office manager posts a "quotable quote" every school day - and so I started printing them up and posting them for my students to see - but I looked the other day and the same one had been up for quite a few days.

I wonder why it's so hard to do things daily? Even writing in a journal weekly or monthly would be a lot more journal writing than I have collected! But I haven't even done that.

If I had written dates on the backs of photos as soon as I had picked them up - back in the day when you had to take your photos in to be developed - I would not have hundreds of photos waiting to be put in order somewhere. (Are any of you wondering when the anniversary posts will resume? I am!)

If every week I tackled one chore - think of all I would get done. I make plans like that all the time.

They are usually only plans though - not much implementation.

But I'm pretty busy - I don't fritter away much time - except when I check the blogs - that's probably frittering!!

At the end of each day, I can put together a pretty credible list of accomplishments. So why do I feel like nothing got done?

And the photo at the top of the page? My college convocation in 1968. Graduating from college was not on any list I ever wrote up.

But it got done!

New Year's Resolutions

This photo has little to do with the post - but I always think I need a photo - Karl says I do - but it does represent the busyness and chaos and good times we've been having these past two weeks!

I generally don't make New Year's resolutions. Maybe I used to - but I don't remember - either if I did or what I resolved.

What I used to always do was go and get a new calendar or notebook and "get organized." And this morning as I was putting stuff in my purse for church, I realized with horror that I didn't even have a current personal calendar!

Life is just happening and I'm losing track or momentum or something!!

Or maybe it's been a very full and busy and wonderful holiday season and I've missed the boat - for the moment anyway. I have some returns to make and some packages to mail, so after school tomorrow, I will go return and mail and stop at Office Depot for a new calendar.

I guess a number of the December and January birthdays are going to be remembered late. A number of other things might be late too - but I will at least have the "to do" list in a safe place. And no one will be surprised to get a late Christmas card from me.

I do remember that my mail-in traffic school is due January 16th. And the bills are due by the 11th. And the first ward conference is January 25th. And the Women's Conference is January 31st - and that's Ara's b-day too. And the Bolander girls are coming Martin Luther King weekend. And we work at the temple this weekend. And Joan and Fred are coming to stay until their place in Loma Linda is available. And I have a Presidency meeting next Sunday. And I have an appointment with the podiatrist on Wednesday. And my new glasses are ready to pick up. And the shirts are ready for pickup at the cleaners on Thursday. And Leslie and Sam are coming at the end of the month.

Hey, why do I need a calendar??