The Choices We Make

Harry left on his mission in February of 1965. He had a girlfriend when I met him, and he still had a girlfriend when he left. The girlfriend lived in Southern California and did not attend BYU. Harry came by our dorm to see me before he left for California to get ready to leave on his mission. In fact, we were on his motorcycle, and he drove it right up to the door of the dorm. I was sure I would never see him again. I told my roommate Joy that very fact. She scoffed and said I'd being seeing him again for sure, that the girlfriend would not wait. I said, "Who wouldn't wait for Harry?"

Dee and I at the Horne Hall Invitational Dance on April 10, 1965.

I soon started dating a friend of my other roommate Marcia. I think he started out with a crush on Marcia, but Marcia's boyfriend, who was on a mission in Alaska, was from this boy's hometown, so I guess he figured he couldn't really put the moves on her with very much impunity! And somehow he was attracted to me.

We had a good time together - he had some "issues," but I was young and pretty much dismissed them. We went hiking, on picnics, to visit his mom and family in Lehi, which was very much just a small spot in the road in those days, and we spent lots of time driving around and talking. He had a severely disabled friend who was wheelchair bound and he went with us lots of times. He was actually a lot of fun to be around too.

When summer came and I went home, Dee wrote me often - more than once a week. In those days, people really didn't call long-distance all that often - it was pretty expensive. In the midst of all these letters, letters from Harry started arriving from Peru, and then Bolivia. Since both young men were not in my vicinity, I was enjoying all the "attention" and not thinking about any repercussions.

At this time I also got the info on the BYU Study Abroad program in Grenoble, France and became nearly obsessed with going. My parents were not very encouraging, mainly because it just looked like a lot of money to them. I had an "iffy" job and wondered how I could pull off saving for Grenoble. Fortunately, I was offered another job, one that would enable me to save for France. It meant skipping fall semester and staying in Granada Hills until I left for France in January, but it seemed a small sacrifice. (Although when I went with my mom and Alice to deposit her at the dorms for her first semester at BYU, I was a little forlorn and wishing that I could indeed "have it all!")

Dee was livid when I told him I would not be coming back fall semester. And even more upset that I'd be gone spring semester also.

Harry was very excited about my trip to France. In fact, he was "stoked" to use his words. He was always encouraging as the months of working and saving money dragged along.

I attended a missionary homecoming in Lehi when we went up to take Alice. Marcia asked me to go along with her since it was a friend of her boyfriend. Dee was there too - and wouldn't talk to me. (On a parenthetical note, the returning elder was Scott Zimmerman - and he was reporting from the same mission where Harry was serving - and he had worked with Harry and had nothing but high praise for him.)

Of course you all know the end of this story. But I was just thinking about my rather poor judgment about boyfriends before Harry came along.

Or maybe I just had the good sense to get out of the picture when a poor choice came along!